✳ THE FORECAST, UNFILTERED
The weather.
Without the bullshit.
Actual forecasts. Questionable attitude. Your local weather with the honesty your ex never had.
FIRST THINGS FIRST
Where the hell are we looking?
Drop your ZIP code above and get the full rundown. Temperatures, rain, hourly details, seven days of drama, and a forecast with a mouth on it.
Reading the sky's bullshit...
Pulling actual weather data. Suspense, apparently, is free.
Well, shit. Something went wrong.
CONDITIONS RIGHT NOW
THE WEATHER IN
--°
✳ YOUR DAILY REALITY CHECK
Here's the damn deal.
Voice is AI-generated with Cloudflare Workers AI. Not an actual human screaming at the sky.
ATTITUDE LEVEL
THE NEXT 24 HOURS
Coming up, whether you like it or not.
HOURLY FORECAST
THE WEEK AHEAD
7-DAY OUTLOOKSeven days of sky drama.
Tap a day for the forecast's highly unprofessional opinion.
DAYLIGHT DEPARTMENT
Sun's working hours.
SUNRISE
SUNSET
REAL DATA, REAL TALKWe roast the weather.
We roast the weather.
We don't invent it.
Forecasts and model-based current conditions from Open-Meteo. ZIP locations by Zippopotam.us. Warnings from the National Weather Service when available. Weather changes, so check important warnings with official sources.